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    I first met Paul (my husband) when I was nineteen-years-old. I had just moved to a new city with my cousin for a fresh start and new adventure!  On my second Sunday in the new city we visited a church and up front there was a hunk of a drum player and well, the rest is history! We dated for six months before getting engaged and we were married almost a year later.  We were young and in love and nothing in the world could stop us. There was one major difference between us that had started to create some issues – I had dated quite a bit prior to Paul and had recently gotten out of some really toxic and verbally abusive relationships, on the other hand I was Paul’s first girlfriend. I had learned well from my past experiences how to fight and stand up for myself and this quickly evolved into what was going to be a huge issue in our first year of marriage. Problems would arise and I would have no hesitation spouting out everything that entered my head where Paul couldn’t find any words. I found myself speaking faster than I could even think.  Eventually what I learned was that what I needed to say most to help this now hurting relationship was nothing at all. I needed to shut my big mouth and wait until he had something to say so he could stand up for himself. Most people find value in hearing words like ‘’I love you” or “You’re beautiful/handsome” and as important as those things are to say often, our relationship was saved by me learning to say nothing at all. In the book Tell Me More written by Kelly Corrigan she explains the importance of specific words to say to keep relationships alive. It is truly an inspiring book as it really makes you evaluate your interactions in all your relationships. It has truly changed my way of thinking and I highly recommend it! http://readtellmemore.8app.io/bRE8 #TellMeMore #ad #RandomHouse #ad
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